The Campaign Leaflet.

Week One.

In the run up to the General Genre Election Roma Tearne will be on her own campaign trail taking the Election Bookshop along with her in a bid to find out what people are really thinking. As resident artist and writer of many years in many strange places, too numerous to list here, she is as interested in The Big Question as anyone else…er…that is to say, hardly at all.

‘It is clear, isn’t it,’ says Roma, a (small) feisty woman who constantly rebrands herself, ‘that the book itself will come out on top?’

The Election Bookshop is less certain. After all e-books, the Amazonian Kindle and other gadgetry are rapidly gaining ground. If sales figures are anything to go by, that is.

‘Sales?’ scoffs Roma. ‘Pheff! I’m not interested in numbers. I’m an artist, don’t you know. And anyway, to have and to hold, Major. That’s where the book triumphs every time. It’s an object, innit!’

To be honest I’ve no idea what she’s talking about. There isn’t a Major in sight.

‘I was referring to a comedy programme from the eighties, stupid. Not the war!’ she tells me, confusing me further.

That’s the trouble with these fiction-makers. One never really knows where one is with them…but to get back to the Election. I thought I’d ask her a few pertinent questions.

‘Who do you think will win, then?’

‘It’s hard to say. There are so many genres, aren’t there. Crimes, thrilling thrillers, dramas….’

‘Greek tragedy?’ I venture and she frowns.

‘I don’t think we’re letting any of that into the list, are we? Just a minute……tragedy in translation….hmm. I don’t think so. We have less than five per cent of translated fiction in this country……hang on while I check with my agent.’

‘Why’s that?’ I ask quickly taking advantage of her hesitation.

‘Why d’you think, Freddy? Why on earth do we want stuff from the foreigners? When we have all we want, here; home-grown, comfortable, understandable. Why pay for translation rights?’

‘My name’s not Freddy,’ I mumble.

She glares at me.

‘Huh? What is it, then? Come on speak up.’

‘It’s Zool,’ I say.

‘Okay cool. Will you give out some ballot papers for me?’

‘Well I… well…could I see them first?’

‘Certainly not. It’s secret, until the big day. This is just the warm up, you know!’

I didn’t, of course.

Roma’s latest book, The Swimmer, is out on 3rd May. She will be writer in residence at Blackwell Bookshop, Oxford, for one week beginning on April 26^th 2010. Let’s hope the shop recovers…..

More about Roma:

• #tvbookclub: Wrecking your chances
• Reading Group Questions
• Q and A: recapturing the past
• A short film about Brixton Beach
• Roma Tearne on writing Brixton Beach