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Christopher Nicholson’s The Elephant Keeper is March’s Independent Book of the Month, available at a special discounted price from most independent bookshops.
Continuing our reading notes series, here is some additional material that we hope you’ll find useful to support your reading…
Additional author material:
Christopher Nicholson’s The Elephant Keeper is March’s Independent Book of the Month, available at a special discounted price from most independent bookshops.
Continuing our reading notes series, here is some additional material that we hope you’ll find useful to support your reading…
Additional author material:
This is part two. Go to Part One.
Let me now address the issue of technique. Whatever you may have been told, there is only one safe way, which is this: to hook your legs over her back, exert strong pressure in every limb. What if she objects? you ask. My answer is: What if she does? Trust me, once you’re in, you’re in. If you are correctly positioned, it is well nigh impossible to her to throw you off.
I’m sorry? Do we ever – what did you call it? No! Absolutely not! Kissing? I won’t comment, except to say that it sounds very complicated, and also unbelievably dangerous. Please, explain, what is the point of it?
I see. Well, I don’t want to be over-critical, or unduly censorious; each to his own. But I think it might be useful for you to ask yourself whether it is altogether necessary. There is – and I cannot emphasise this strongly enough – nothing to be gained in taking unnecessary risks.
For us, the most dangerous part of all, even more dangerous than the approach, is the getting away. In my experience – I don’t know if you’d agree with this, but in my experience, the best thing is to get away fast. As soon as you’ve disengaged, scarper. Don’t stop for chitchat, don’t hang around for thank-yous and good-byes, don’t dawdle, don’t even wait for her to turn in your direction. Slip out and go. No, I wouldn’t say that manners come into it. Manners? It’s nothing to do with manners, surely; we’re talking about self-preservation. She’s almost twice as big as you, remember? She’s got poison fangs. Don’t take risks.
What? You mean your one doesn’t have poison fangs? Boy, you’re lucky! Mine, over there, she has these gigantic fangs swollen with poison. You can’t see them now, she keeps them tucked away, but they’re there all right, and if one of them gets you, you’re done for. Because the poison has a paralysing agent in it. It’s a complete sod. You’re finally managed to have sex with her, you clamber off her back; next thing you know, she’s injecting you with a shot of chemicals! And once you’re paralysed, well, you’re at her mercy. What happens then? I’d rather not say, it doesn’t bear thinking about. But, let me put it like this, the story doesn’t end happily ever after. All right, the truth is that she ties you up and stores you somewhere until she gets hungry. Then she eats you, in revenge.
Oh, is that so? Then it’s not so different for you after all! Well, it’s a funny old world!
I must say, this has been one of the most interesting conversations I’ve ever had. I wonder – I throw out the idea, in passing – what you would think about, you know, trying a swap. For the experience, I mean. If we did, tell me, what would be the best way?
Right. So, pretty much the same approach. Stealth, caution. Up the inner part of the leg, when she’s asleep. Some hair to negotiate, that’s fine, I can do that easily enough, I’m used to birds’ nests. After that? After that I’m there? Fantastic! Bingo! And no poison fangs to worry about!
It’s a thought, at least. Something for the future. Right now, though, it’s getting dark, and I’m going to head for the window and try my luck. I’m on quite a roll at the moment, you know. Four times this week already. Sometimes I tell myself I should give it up, that if I keep on like this I’m bound to get injected and eaten, but it’s not easy to give up. I don’t want to give it up, to be honest; even if I did want to, I’m not sure I could.
What about you? I have a hunch – only a hunch, but my hunches are usually right – that you’re going to end up lucky tonight. If you like, if you’re free tomorrow, we could meet and compare notes. Find out how each of us fared. See you then. All the best. But do remember, at the first possible opportunity; get your legs hooked right over her back. Once you’re in, as I say, you’re in.
This story was originally published anonymously, as part of the ANONthology project.
Chris’ The Elephant Keeper is published this month and is available at a discount price from most independent book shops.
A short story by Chris Nicholson
****
I know, I understand: it’s always tricky. Everything’s tricky. The timing of the approach, the manner of the approach; you never know how it’s going to pan out. You have to be careful, really careful.
At this very moment, for instance, over there, by the window. That’s the one. You can’t see her that clearly in the shadows, but she’s there all right. I’ve been watching for days and days, weighing up my options, sifting the possibilities. I admit, I’ve become a bit obsessed, a touch infatuated. Should I go for it or not? Might be a big mistake: she’s big, much bigger than me. Stronger than me. They always are.
It’s the same for you, you reckon. Where? That one! Also by the window! What a coincidence!
You’re not sure if this is a good time to make a move? No, me neither. But I do have some experience in these matters; permit me, if I may, to ask you a few questions. First, is she aware of your existence? You think she may be, you think she may not be. Exactly the same for me. Second, are you aware of anyone else who may be considering an approach? Or of anyone who may currently be approaching her? In short, do you have any rivals? I ask only because rivals can cause all kinds of complications. It’s probably not a good thing for you to make an approach if she’s already with one of your rivals, unless you’re very confident.
You’re not very confident? That’s no bad thing; over-confidence is so often fatal. What’s needed, above all, are good judgement and good technique.
You don’t think that there are any rivals but you’re not certain? No, you’re certain that there are no rivals, but you’re worried that one or more may appear if you don’t act quickly. I sympathise with you here. It’s an awful feeling when someone jumps in ahead of you, destroying your plans. It’s happened to all of us. But I’d like to point out that, in your own words, there are no rivals at present. That’s a big positive. Hang on to that. Or, if you prefer, let’s examine the scenario in which, just as you’re making your approach, you become aware of a rival. Now, this rival will be as concerned by the sight of you as you are by the sight of him. So, don’t back off; stand your ground, and make it clear that you have no intention of giving way. A show of strength is often very effective, in my experience; it’s rare for there to be a fight. With a bit of luck he’ll decide to leave the field. Sometimes, of course, a rival shows up who is stronger than you, and equally determined; in that case, I admit, it may be prudent to beat a temporary retreat. Your chance will come again.
But let’s assume that there are no rivals; you’ve got a clear run. How should you approach her? Timing is obviously critical. In my view, it’s best to approach when she’s preoccupied by something else, when she’s distracted – for instance, when she’s sewing, or eating. When she’s just eaten is the best time, of course. I should have said, very important indeed, never approach if she looks hungry. Never even think of it.
Hungry for sex? I suppose so. It’s not a phrase I feel very comfortable with, to be honest. What does it mean? I see. How very extraordinary. Well, that’s one significant difference between us. I envy you that, I must say.
In terms of approach strategy, there are different schools of thought. Some argue that the essence lies in speed, while others advocate a more painstaking advance. My own advice breaks the approach into two separate phases.
Phase one should always be slow. Rush from a distance, and it’s odds-on she’ll take fright and try to hide. So, slowly does it. Don’t alarm her. She may see you, she may not. She may be a cunning type – pretend that she hasn’t seen you, when she has. If she turns towards you, don’t run away: remain still, keep calm, try to read what’s in her mind. Easier said than done, I know. If she turns towards you and waves her legs in the air, that’s a difficult one, it could mean a number of things.
What? Leg-waving is a definite positive for you, is it? How interesting. I’d have said, based on my experience, that it’s pretty ambiguous. It may be a come-on, but, equally likely, it may be telling you to go away. It may seem like a come-on, when it’s an invitation to a trap. You need to be wary. If it ever happens to me, the leg-waving, my usual response is to wave back, in the hope that she’ll think that I’m just passing by. Hi. All the best. And on I go.
Frankly, I do my best to avoid being seen, and that’s why I always recommend evenings and nights, when there’s not too much light. Bright mornings and afternoons are definitely to be avoided. Pitch darkness is good, but then you’re relying on your hearing to locate exactly where she is.
Now to phase two. Inevitably, as you get nearer and nearer, however careful you are, however silently you move, there will come a point when you’re detected. Ideally, you need to make your move just before that point, when you still have surprise on your side. That’s the perfect moment. Of course, I admit, it’s not easy, especially for novices, to get the timing right, and it’s not really something that can be taught; it’s a matter of judgement and calculation, which grows with experience. If you go too early, she may run away before you reach her; if you leave it too late, she’ll probably turn to face you, and then you’ll have to use your negotiating skills to extricate yourself. Things can turn pretty nasty. In general, in this second phase, when you move, move quickly, as quickly as possible. Be bold, be decisive.
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Chris’ The Elephant Keeper is published this month and is available at a discount price from most independent book shops.
Elephants are wonderful creatures to write about. It’s partly their strange, improbable appearance – those flapping ears, the piggy eyes, the ropey little tail, that twirling, muscular trunk – and partly their vast, mysterious, complex intelligence. They have paradoxical qualities: they’re big and heavy, but can move lightly and delicately; they’re very strong, but also very gentle and tender. They exhibit something like the same range and depth of emotions as humans: rage, greed, jealousy, hatred, impatience, curiosity, love. Some elephants have exuberant, extrovert personalities; some are shy and reflective. In other ways, they are unlike humans: the differences are perhaps as interesting as the similarities.
‘The Elephant Keeper’ is set in late 18th century England. Zoos did not exist, and there were scarcely any elephants in the country. Animals were generally seen as unthinking and unfeeling, though attitudes were changing: a few enlightened people had begun to ask challenging questions. The most intriguing question, and one that the novel raises, is this: what would it be like to be an elephant? What would it be like to slip into an elephant’s mind, to become an elephant? How would one perceive the world?
Much the same questions, of course, could be asked of any historical character. What did it feel like to live in the 18th century? But ‘The Elephant Keeper’ isn’t a straightforward historical novel; it’s as much fantasy as history. When I wonder why I wrote it, I think of real elephants but I also remember how, as a little boy living in suburbia, I used to fantasise about zoo animals roaming the English countryside, and how in my bedroom I had a long procession of carved wooden elephants which were the last things I saw each night before closing my eyes to sleep.
ELEPHANTS have had a strange history in Britain. For many centuries, that is, there were no elephants in the country, and yet they lived in the popular imagination as fabulous, powerful animals. They were like dragons and basiliks, half-real, half-fictional. Few people could be sure that they definitely existed, let alone be confident of knowing what it might be like to meet a real elephant. In the absence of hard facts imagination takes wing, and falsehoods about elephants abounded. In the medieval period and later it was widely believed that elephants lived for two or three hundred years, that they were frightened of mice, that they worshipped the moon, that they could write Greek. The monks whose gorgeous illustrations fill the medieval bestiaries had never seen elephants, and so they copied illustrations in earlier bestiaries, which were themselves copied from earlier works – in the process, mistakes were multiplied and magnified. The bestiary elephants are typically ludicrous creatures equipped with boarish tusks, trumpet trunks and slender, deer-like legs. Very occasionally, a real elephant appeared to challenge these inventions. The Romans supposedly brought elephants to Britain in the invasion of ad 43, and in the winter of 1254 Louis IX of France gave Henry III of England an African elephant. Housed in the Tower of London, it was given fine wine and fed choice cuts of beef, a diet which may have contributed to its early death. It’s possible that there was another elephant in England a few years later: an elephant’s leg-bone, found in Chester, has been carbon-dated to the fourteenth century. These real animals were soon forgotten. What survived, in people’s imaginations, was a variety of fictional elephants: some huge and terrifying, with sharp tusks and gramophone ears, others squat and tubby. It was in the mid to late eighteenth century, the period in which The Elephant Keeper is set, that the imaginary life of elephants began to fade. Travel to Africa and India had become more common; zoology was increasingly well organised and, from the 1790s, there was a London menagerie in which members of the public could see elephants. Misconceptions about the habits and nature of elephants persisted for many years longer, but it was no longer possible to think of elephants as not real. By the mid-nineteenth century, even people living deep in the countryside must have had a fair idea what a real elephant looked like.
‘I asked the sailor what an Elephant looked like; he replied that it was like nothing on earth.’
In the middle of the 18th century, a ship docks at Bristol with an extraordinary cargo: two young elephants. Bought by a wealthy landowner, they are taken to his estate in the English countryside. A stable boy, Tom Page, is given the task of caring for them.
‘The Elephant Keeper’ is Tom’s account of his life with the elephants. As the years pass, and as they journey across England, his relationship with the female elephant deepens in a startling manner. Along the way they meet incredulity, distrust and tragedy, and it is only their understanding of each other that keeps them together.
Christopher Nicholson’s charming and captivating novel explores notions of sexuality and violence, freedom and captivity, and the nature of story-telling – but most of all it is the study of a profound and remarkable love between an elephant and a human being.
***
But don’t just take my word for it….
A charming tale of an inter-species friendship – Independent
The man who pinned a tale on an elephant – Guardian
A Love that Rumbles with Heft, Grace – Washington Post
The Elephant Keeper is the ‘indie’ Book of the Month and is available from most independents book shops for a special price.
Via @GalleyCat
Jason Boog at GalleyCat writes:
Orbit Books creative director Lauren Panepinto gave aspiring artists, science fiction fans, and publishing aficionados a peek into her long process of designing a book cover. This two-minute video captures every Photoshop tweek and edit on the cover design of an upcoming novel by Gail Carriger.
To read the full post, click here.
Read more about Design:
It seems like Isabel Allende is not the only one doing good deeds today. Our friends Enhanced Editions, who helped us out with the amazing Wolf Hall app have also produced these iPhone versions of 2010’s Quick Reads books, published on World Book Day.
As part of this year’s Quick Reads and World Book Day initiatives, Enhanced Editions has partnered with a number of leading publishers to bring brilliantly written books by bestselling authors and celebrities to the iPhone.
Each product contains sample chapters from the other Quick Reads apps, a news feed to keep you up-to-date with competitions and other events, as well as all of our usual features.
The apps include short titles by authors Andy McNab, Peter James (who made his first iPhone outing late last year with this excellent carousel app) and my favourite, Cathy Kelly’s The Perfect Holiday. (Biased? Me? Never.)
All the apps are priced at £1.79.
About The Perfect Holiday
On an idyllic Greek island, Anthony and Carole have begun to repair their damaged marriage. Widowed Jessica has started to heal at last and is learning to live her life again. But on the flight home, unexpected and startling events force Anthony, Carole and Jessica to face up to the difficult truths they have been avoiding. By the time they land, the lessons they have learned will change their lives for ever.
About The Quick Reads initiative:
Quick Reads are part of a campaign to get more people reading in the UK and Ireland. They are short, sharp shots of entertainment – fast, fun books by bestselling writers and celebrities which prove that books can be as exciting as an action film and as thrilling as a theme-park ride. Since its inception in March 2006, over one and a quarter million Quick Reads have reached new readers.
Free courses are available for anyone who wants to develop their skills. You can attend the courses in your local area. If you’d like to find out more, phone 0800 66 0800.
A list of books for new readers can be found on www.firstchoicebooks.org.uk or at your local library.
Publishers Barrington Stoke and New Island also provide books for new readers.
The BBC runs an adult basic skills campaign. See www.bbc.co.uk/raw.
Enhanced Editions is committed to improving literacy and using technology to bring great literature to new readers. In keeping with this commitment, all of our profits from the Quick Reads titles will be donated to a literacy charity.
(from enhanced-editions.com)
Read more about digital publishing…
It’s always nice to have an author on the list who is not only a great writer but also a caring person.
On Friday Fourth Estate author Isabel Allende announced that she has pledged $500,000 to “Chile ayuda a Chile,” a telethon that will be broadcast from Teatro Teletón in Santiago, Chile from March 5 to 6, 2010 to raise funds for the construction of emergency housing for those displaced by the devastating earthquake of February 27, 2010.
Allende, a native of Chile, will also participate as a phone operator for the telethon. “I am certain that nothing will be wasted and nothing will disappear in the maze of corruption as often happens in crises such as these,” says Isabel Allende.
“The press reports and television footage show unimaginable devastation. I feel an urgent need to return home and do whatever I can to help.”
In addition to this grant, the Isabel Allende Foundation will continue its longstanding practice of making grants to grassroots NGO’s empowering women in Chile through The Global Fund for Women.
Click here for more information about Chile ayuda a Chile.
Or here to find out about the Global Fund for Women
For more information about Isabel, click Isabel Allende.
Please mail Rebecca McEwan with any PR Enquiries.
This is the first of the top secret iPhone projects I’ve been working on for the last few months – the result of a close collaboration between Fourth Estate and the awesome Enhanced Editions (founded by longtime 5th Estate friend and contributor, Peter Collingridge). Finally all the hard work has come to fruition, and we can announce…
WOLF HALL by Hilary Mantel, out now in paperback, and on your iPhone. Choose your weapon!
About Wolf Hall:
‘It is The Book, without question, that leaves every other novel I have read this year in its wake. Magnificent’ James Naughtie, Sunday Telegraph, Books of the Year.
‘A stunning book. It breaks free of what the novel has become nowadays. I can’t think of anything since Middlemarch which so convincingly builds a world.’ Diana Athill
‘The most gripping book you’ll ever read’ The Times
‘Dizzyingly, dazzlingly good’ Daily Mail
‘A superb epic work’ Kate Mosse, author of Labyrinth
‘Genuinely outstanding’ Independent
‘A feast’ Daily Telegraph
‘Bewitching’ Observer
The Wolf Hall App is a feature-packed ebook version of the 2009 Man Booker prize winning Wolf Hall by Hilary Mantel. In Wolf Hall, Mantel, one of UK’s leading writers, brings the opulent, brutal world of the Tudors to bloody, glittering life. Wolf Hall is the backdrop to the rise and rise of Thomas Cromwell: lowborn boy, charmer, bully, master of deadly intrigue, and, finally, most powerful of Henry VIII’s courtiers.
“We’re thrilled to be launching this app on the App Store at the same time as our paperback publication of the phenomenon that is Wolf Hall,” said Press Books MD, John Bond. “The enhanced app for iPhone and iPod touch gives us an opportunity to reach readers who want to experience the book in an exciting new way.”
“Releasing an enhanced edition of the most successful Man Booker prize winner ever shows the incredible growth and authority now associated with reading on iPhone and iPod touch,” said Peter Collingridge, Enhanced Editions. “This is a book that defies simple categorisation and we expect it to gain a whole new audience now that it is also an app.”
Hilary Mantel’s Booker Prize-winning novel has now been tailor-made for the iPhone. It includes the full ebook, a set of video interviews between Hilary Mantel and Professor David Starkey, and other great extras.
As well as a paid app at £6.99 (paperback RRP £8.99) there’s also a free app which contains chapter one of Wolf Hall, the news feed, and a short clip from the video discussion.
More information…
About the author:
Hilary Mantel is the author of twelve books, including A Place of Greater Safety, Giving up the Ghost and Beyond Black, which was shortlisted for the 2006 Orange Prize. Wolf Hall won the 2009 Man Booker Prize and was shortlisted for the 2009 Costa Novel Award.
About the publisher:
Founded by Victoria Barnsley in 1984 and acquired by HarperCollins in 2000, Fourth Estate is one of the most innovative imprints in the industry with a reputation for selecting critically-acclaimed titles such as Half of a Yellow Sun by Orange Broadband prize-winner Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie, Notes from an Exhibition by Patrick Gale and the 2009 Man Booker Prize winner Wolf Hall by Hilary Mantel. Recent non-fiction successes include Bad Science by Ben Goldacre and Tender Volume 1 by Nigel Slater.
About Enhanced Editions:
Founded by a team of former publishers in 2009, Enhanced Editions has the singular vision of bringing the iPhone the reading experience it deserves.
Our apps include titles by Nick Cave, Barack Obama, David Simon and David Eagleman, and have been described as “the moment digital publishing came of age” (The Bookseller). As well as receiving outstanding user acclaim, our apps have featured in Apple’s “Best Apps of 2009″; The Observer’s “Best Cultural Apps of 2009″; and Wallpaper / Wolff Olins’ “Ten Things to Change The World in 2010″. Enhanced Editions also won the eConsultancy “Innovation in User Experience” award in 2009 and have been shortlisted for the Media Guardian Innovation awards.
Read more…
More about digital publishing:
More about Wolf Hall:
